Dennis and I went out for a nice lunch today.  We went up to the Chowder Pot in Hartford.  I have been wanting crab cakes, and he wanted a good steak.  We were pleasantly surprised that the restaurant wasn't too busy, and we didn't have to wait.  Usually there is a line out the door with about an hour wait.  The food was excellent and we both ate our fill.  If we want dinner tonight, it will be something light.

    It was actually hot here today once the morning rain cleared out.  The temperature on the back porch was up to 80 degrees!  It was actually too hot and buggy to work in the garden.  I hope this isn't a preview of the summer.  More rain is due and the temperatures are suppose to drop.  We might have sleet

    I feeling rather melancholy today, for lack of a better term.  I'm concerned and worried about the surgery tomorrow.  This will sound weird, but I keep sneaking a peek at the breast, knowing that after tonight, it will be severely scarred.  I'll never look the same, at least not to me.  I know the scars will fade and the tissue he removes will be replaced with scar tissue and fluid.  But it just won't be the same.  I don't know why it's bothering me so much this time.  I've had this type of surgery before, only now it's definitely cancer.  I guess we always fear the unknown.

    I remember when I was in parochial school, the nuns used to tell us stories.  One story was that when we all die and go to heaven, the scars that we have received in our lives will turn into jewels and gold.  We will wear gorgeous robes like the angels, and our former scars will glitter in heaven's light.

    That story isn't helping me tonight.  I'm really not as brave as I pretend to be.